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A little help, please

I was telling my grandma the other day that it's so weird how dead on the division of trimesters is for me. As soon as I hit week 14/15, a switch goes off and I suddenly don't feel the need to carry a puke bucket with me wherever I go. Now, at week 27/28, what was recently a cute bulging belly that made for a nice accessory has suddenly become more like a bowling ball and it is in my way.

This is precisely where my conundrum comes in...

Disclaimer: These words of caution are mainly for my dad and father-in-law, quite possibly the only men who frequent this space to see how life is going for us and our darling girl. I am about to discuss things that will likely contain more than you want to know about your daughter's body. Read on if you must, but consider yourselves warned.

OK. When I got to this stage of my pregnancy with Addie, it was in the dead of winter. Wearing a bathing suit was no where near on my radar. So, when my belly got really big and cumbersome to work around, I simply put my razor aside, and stopped that part of my hygiene routine until after Addie was born. Ladies, you know what I'm getting at, right?

With the temperature outside steadying in the 80 degree range and higher for the foreseeable future, and with a girl who loves the pool and being outside in general, I am presented with the question: How in the heck am I supposed to shave my bikini area? Am I supposed to not worry about it, let it go and shock/gross the hell out of anyone who gets close to me at the pool? Am I supposed to channel my inner Gumbi and find a way to stretch and bend myself into a position where I can get to the goods? Do I need to find a good waxing place in the greater Lexington area (please say no, as I cringe at the mere thought)? Do I risk injury and go for it, totally blind?

Some of you may be thinking to yourselves, Why is she writing about this in a public space, on her blog? To that I say, I sincerely believe that when we as women run into issues with our bodies, no matter how trivial they may seem, chances are we aren't alone. However, many of us feel too embarassed to bring up these questions with each other at the risk of sounding silly or for fear of being humiliated. Most of the time, when I do get up the courage to ask girlfriends about this kind of thing, I am met with wide eyes, a hand on my arm and an, "Oh my gosh, me too!!!"

All that being said, I am putting on my big girl panties (and trust me, right now they are big) and asking for help from the wealth of knowledge that is women and moms out there who may have wisdom to impart on this topic. Any ideas for how I can get through these next few months without either maiming myself or looking like I walked straight out of a 70's bra-burning convention? If you don't feel comfortable leaving a comment publicly, just send me a quick email (mommyhonesty@gmail.com) and I will hold your name in confidence.

As of right now, I am just barely able to keep up the maintenance. But any day, this kiddo is going to be so big that she will likely no longer allow herself to be pushed aside in order to accommodate her Mommy's need to be presentable in a bathing suit in public. Help!

12 comments:

Dennis said...

I have one work for you: BURKINI!

It's a bathing suit for Muslim women...and we all know what kind of...um..."trimming" that Middle eastern women do (or not do) on lower extremities and the like. So you're covered in more ways than one. Maybe you could loose the hood though...

Check it out.....

http://i110.photobucket.com/albums/n82/attomanen/burkini.jpg

Dennis said...

PS. Please don't start ranting about me being anti-Muslim, etc. etc. It a fact that different cultures do things differently. It's not good or bad. It's just...different than what we might be used to. FWIW.....

scrappingadvocate said...

Make the hubs do it for you. He's the one who got you in this situation in the first place!

Us said...

I went in blind. We've been shaving near the goods for years now. I have full faith in you!!!!

Den Bräckliga said...

A man's gotta do what a man's got to do!

You're hilarious Sara! Just wish I get to know you in person some day!

My latest post called "terror love" (something for your dad? ;) and is about our very terroristic 2year old. At the end I just wonder how you can get angry at such a happy terrorist. Check out the pics, I guess you know what I mean!

All my love to you, hairy or shaved!

sara said...

Oh you all made me laugh!

Dad, nice thought, but something tells me comfort would be a factor there... I get hot way too easily to cover up that much.

I have thought about having Curt give it a go, but logistically I really don't know how it would work...

My sister said I should try getting a "personaly trimmer" and at least manicure the area that way... But a well manicured lawn is still a lawn on display so I'm not sure how I feel about that. Man, this is tricky business!!!

The Yellow Door Paperie said...

O yikes! This made me laugh, but seriously. I had a maternity bathing suit with a bit of a skirt. So perfect trimming was not necessary...

Dennis said...

See!?!?!? Burkini! Muslim women get pregnant too. I bet they make them for expectant mothers. And as far as the heat goes...jump in the water to cool off!

What size would you wear? I'll get one on Amazon for you.

Meegan said...

So I learned this AFTER giving birth in August to Gracie...many places that wax will also shave your bikini area. Most spas do not recommend waxing for pregnant women so they offer the shaving service instead. My girlfriend said it was approx $10 and they just asked that she bring her own razor. They would apply a nair-like lotion afterwards and it allowed her to go a week between visits. Hope that helps!
Meegan

Shawna Fite said...

Sara, I recommend using a strategically placed mirror...that should at least help with the blindness! Otherwise, go with a maternity suit with a cute boy short bottom...problem solved! http://www.amazon.com/Maternity-Swimwear-Tankini-Bathing-Prego/dp/B003CU91UA

sara said...

Oh my goodness, I am so pleased to have recived such incredible responses to this issue! Clearly I was right and am not the only pregnant woman to have this question.

Thank you all for taking the time to share your ideas and secrets! But beware, this opens the door for similar discussions in the future. ;)

Papaw said...

The "disclaimer" was very thoughtful...should have stopped right there...but I didn't...next time I will.