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Friday Pray along

Here I am on Friday with a hungry tummy as I hold my breath, praying that my girls sleep long enough for me to write something that is somewhat coherent. The past two days, that has certainly not been the case. For those who visit this space frequently you know that I rarely miss a day, and certainly not two days in a row, without announcing it first. I suppose that's why, on days when I'm unable to post, I start getting calls from family in the evening, checking on me... "I noticed you didn't post today. Is everything alright?" 

The answer to that question is yes, sort of. Everything is fine--no one is ill or injured. But these last few weeks have certainly been difficult for me. Perhaps it's because I've had a headache since November 22nd, or maybe it's that Addie's nap time has suddenly become half as long as it once was, or it could be that having two young kids at home has finally started to catch up to me. Whatever it is, I am so tired.

I really despise spending time writing rants or using this space to vent about how hard being a stay-at-home-mom sometimes is. All I will say is that these past few weeks, it has been really hard for me. On a deep level I still love it, but the days that I stay in "lounge wear" are growing in number and the pockets of "me time" I try and find throughout the day so I can feel rejuvenated are quickly decreasing.

Yesterday, the girls and I were out and we dropped by Curt's work to bring him lunch. When he got in the car and looked at me, he said something like, "Oh, honey. It's going to be OK." I didn't even have to say a word. I am just so tired, and it shows.

We have so much to be grateful and thankful for. I am healthy. I am able to function normally and engage with my healthy and beautiful girls. My family is together. We love one another. That's all that matters in this world, and I can easily be brought to tears when I stop and think of all the blessings in our lives.

I struggle with thinking that I should spend more time focusing on others because if I give more, then maybe I'll have more love and less anxiety in my heart. And then I think that I need to take the time to focus on my own needs so that I have a full heart that is able to give.   

So here I am at pray along Friday, tummy growling, eyelids drooping, now with a gorgeous baby in my lap, and I am having a hard time asking what to pray for... time to rest? a cure for my headaches? more gratitude in my heart? I'm not sure. Today I will simply ask that you pray for me and all mothers who struggle with finding balance... I think that might be all of us!

One thing I'm not too tired for is prayer. I actually seem to be doing a lot of that lately. So don't hold back--throw a piece of your heart into the pot. We'll hold it close and lift it up...

Here's how it works: Leave a prayer request in the comments on Friday's posts. It can be anything--something you are thankful for, a friend you are worried about, a desire from your heart... Anything. By leaving a comment you are also committing to pray for others who comment as well. We'll start fresh each week. That's it. You can even be anonymous if you wish.

4 comments:

Molly said...

I've had horrible headaches my entire pregnancy, Tylenol just doesn't cut it. St. Teresa of Avila is the patron saint of headaches, ask for her intercession and I will pray for you too!

katharine.hahn said...

Sara, I am breathing in your tiredness and pain and sending out to you some rest and relief. I imagine some time for you when you are alone with a pink and yellow bubble around you, in which you can mother only yourself.

My own prayer request is for steadiness and peace through times of change. Thanks for opening up this space for connection.

mary said...

Even though my children are all grown, I still struggle with my desire to provide for them vs. their need to be independent. So balance is a wonderful prayer for any mom.

My prayer request is for two friends whose husbands (both in their 40's) are desperately ill. Please pray with me for grace and strength for Tammy and Cindy, as all their efforts are focused on the needs of others.

Emily said...

Hello Sara,
When times get rough take comfort in the fact that you are in a financial position to stay at home.
So many are not as fortunate and only wish they could experience the joy and exhaustion that comes with staying at home. It will get better!